Wed Day

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Have you all seen the movie Her? I loved it. It's such an interesting commentary on modern relationships. People gravitating toward situations full of emotional intimacy without the physical aspects. A backlash of sorts to the casual hook-up perhaps?

That's the topic of this NYT article "Romance at Arms' Length," exploring "the rise of online-only relationships, a phenomenon I’ve begun to call Soul Mate in a Box.

A Soul Mate in a Box (Smiab, for short) is a person we rarely if ever meet and in some cases never speak to, but to whom we feel closer than anyone else. Maybe the relationship exists through instant messages, or over email, or via Skype, FaceTime and texting. Perhaps Snapchat allows the couple to exchange racy pictures, adding a glimpse of sexuality, if not sex. One couple liked to view each other on Skype but weren’t comfortable talking that way, so they’d instant message instead, watching each other click away at the keyboard as they swooned.

How do these relationships start? Typically with two strangers crossing paths via social media... No need to think seriously about it, because what could happen? He or she lives 2,000 miles away!
Ironically, it’s often this presumed lack of possibility that enables the couple to grow so close so fast...

We’re always searching for new ways of finding love that don’t involve having to feel insecure and vulnerable, because who wants to feel insecure and vulnerable?"

So fascinating right? What do you think? Would you explore a relationship like this or do you know anyone who has?  

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  1. Something tells me it's a sad movie, tell me if I'm wrong? I try to avoid sad now as much as I can.

    1. It's a little melancholy at times, but I didn't think it was sad overall. Just really interesting.


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